There is no way to fairly compare our experience as first time parents with our experience now. If anything, the exhaustion is probably double that of our experience the first time around since we need to balance our time and attention between two children. To be honest, my recovery feels so much longer this time around since I've had very little time to relax and just rest. Oh, and have I mentioned that we do have a third baby of sorts, being still in the first year of a fledgling business?
I've complained about running on empty with only prayer to back me up. I've mentioned last time that a single week has seen me go through highs and lows faster than I've gone through in previous years.
The strain is, from my point of view, immense, and sometimes I do just want to sit everything out and just lock myself away for a while, not to be bothered by anyone.
I can wish.
As a means of coping, though, I've started getting myself into various types of work outside of what I consider my day job, that is, being wife, mother, and entrepreneur. I've always enjoyed writing and that is the degree I completed in college. I'm putting it to use now by freelancing for a local magazine. I've also always been interested in photography and various visual arts. Photography I'm putting to good use alongside my magazine writing, though in a few months, I do aim to train further with photographer friends who have far more experience in the field. And I have been painting again as I've previously showcased.
Considering I don't have much time alone, doing this has helped ease some of the tension I've had in my system. Do I wonder if I'm simply escaping from one form of stress to another? Constantly. But I will take it if it keeps me from breaking down completely. Besides, painting has been so calming for me and engaging for my toddler. What mother can help but indulge her child when he shows so much interest in what mommy is up to?
As far as this blog is concerned, regular visitors will notice changes going on. I'm trying to update it to a new look. It can take a while, but I'm not going anywhere. This time it's going to be part of my daily discipline and training to write even just a few words here--at least on the scheduled days. ^_~
Do stay tuned and keep indulging my letters to the Interweb in general.
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